I Wonder If My 9 Figure Man Read My Blog?

... and was offended by that Jar of Hearts comment? Or perhaps he knows how bimbo I am from my Good Friday Good Laugh? We talked today and he's standing really firm and acting nonchalant, but it secretly winds me up that's he's so potent and powerful. The guy can negotiate! But so can I...

I added some additional services to our agreement rather than lowering my fee, but he didn't sound too hot about it. Should I just jump on his treasure trunk?

I have a new suitor though and I literally spoke to someone from the peerage today - no joke! Now I'm going to do two presentations to knock both their socks off.

The market's open today, but it would have been better if it had just stayed closed:

+1.27% SBA

-0.91% Roth IRA

-0.18% S&P

-0.21% DJIA

+0.17% Nasdaq

HSFTs, touch my pips and make me happy again...

That Was Just So Embarrassing...

... forget I even mentioned it because apparently, the market was closed.

Ooopss... apparently not a ForexDiva First...

The Bwahaha's Only Fun...

... when you're the one doling it out. And today, I could have been, but since it's almost Easter Bunny Time, I'll behave and just do my Catholic Schoolgirl Screaming especially since I don't have to go into the Confessional Booth:

+4.53% SBA (only because of GEN)

+1.81% Roth IRA (thanks to HWD)

+0.53% S&P

DJIA +0.42%

Nasdaq 0%

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph...

Happy Easter, HSFTs! Where do you think I hid my Easter Bunny Ears this year?

So If A Gentleman Doesn't Call...

... when he says he will, could he still be considered a gentleman based only on the fact that he is 9 Figures? The old me, who was bitter instead of sweet, would have dedicated Jar of Hearts to him!

But the new me? Oh, I'll keep going with my other suitors. It was another late night because apparently all the people I am looking to target all like to arrive at the office late. So I have a very strange schedule going on. I need to call people in Asia and in Belgium. This gives me a window of like five or six hours of sleep every night and you all know I take an hour long shower, so this just isn't enough time for a woman like me. Plus, I have to cook and clean. I can't wait till I could outsource the cleaning since I mop like every two days! I've therefore been skipping the calls to Belgium this week in favour of sleep.

Next week, I have to start calling Belgium. The companies in Asia have been very, very receptive to me so far, but once I send them a quotation, I have to wait and wait. Everyone thinks they're going to be getting a distressed sale, but I'm only going to appreciate. I'm going on my third quotation now.

If I don't hear from Mr 9 Figures next week, I think that negotiation is pretty much done and I'll need to move on with the rest. Oh, but he was so kind and I'd really like to work with him. But this is business and I am a woman who traded the Hung Parliament and the Japanese Earthquake too.

Plus, my portfolio is way too hot today:

+4.55% SBA (how in the world did that happen? I suppose we have Mr. Paulson to thank for the +5.57% move on GEN)

+1.81% Roth IRA (Harry's making me burn with trading desire once again)

+0.53% S&P

+0.42% DJIA

+0.63% Nasdaq

Another Late Night...

I did some more cold calling last night to the point where someone actually asked me what I was doing up so late, then tossed and turned until at least 3:30 am pondering why my 9 Figure Man hasn't called yet. Is he just busy? Or is he traveling? Or is he just plain playing mind games with me?

But there's no doubt in my mind that there is only one woman who can give him what he needs - and that happens to be moi!

Our negotiation has been very much like a high stakes poker game. I know when we finally get around to working together, there'll be a lot of trading plaisir. And I'm looking for a long term collaboration with this man. He is a gentleman above all and it won't be just about the moola, although a lot of it will be. The best part is that he didn't comment about my diva travel demands. I stipulated the exact hotel and airline / class I want to travel on in the agreement and all he mentioned was that my consultation fee was exorbitant. Is it? I'm worth it!

In addition to a fantastic lunch comprising of my homemade signature herb-crusted chicken tahini wrap, I also had a good trading session today, although I was absent for most of the day:

-0.64% SBA

+1.77% Roth IRA

+1.35% S&P

+1.52% DJIA

+2.10% Nasdaq

I Admit It...

... my recent portfolio rebalancing was a disaster and I might have done better by staying put with the investments that were already in my portfolio last December. I'm still a bit baffled as to what went wrong with my new strategy and there could be a few key reasons for my unappealing trading results of late.

First, I switched time zones. Whereas before, I had the luxury of dedicating several hours a day solely to trading, I now have to juggle building up my new business along with trading. Next, I switched computers too. I don't have eSignal installed anymore and have to get around to doing it if it's even available to Mac users. I absolutely abhor the Mac. It's totally overrated and once I sign on with my 9 Figure Man, I might actually switch back to the PC. I'm also in a totally risk-averse frame of mind due to my quickly depreciating assets. Finally, there are many distractions around the library here. People are noisy, the music's loud, and ever since some of my neighbours found out that I'm renting my apartment and spend a lot less money than they do to reap the same rewards, I've been One Hated Woman. I suppose the fact that one of them overheard me saying that there's a lot of inventory in the building didn't help either. People have been complaining about the pettiest things about me to the superintendent. I don't mind. The fact is that there are at least three other buildings I can stay in for the same amount of money and some of them may be even newer and nicer. So perhaps I should move!

But there's just too much to do and not enough time to do it. Last night, I was awake till about 2 am following up with some of my suitors - some of which turned out to be uninteresting. I haven't done a cold call in like 10 years, so I was muttering and the first two were pretty embarrassing. But I kept going and finally, my lucky break occurred. Two in a row, in fact! Some of my suitors fell off my A-List because they just didn't sound like people I could work with. And I know only one deserves my extra special incentive. No, it's not my chastity!

So far, I have a handful of serious contenders and this is what I need. I'd like a few more just to up the odds. I have to keep all of them interested and at the same time maximise my consulting fee whilst not going overboard with the TETSOB thing. It's a very delicate balance.

Evidently, TETSOB doesn't always result in stellar trading results and nothing can save me but Bernanke himself for he and I have a similar batting average apparently:

+0.47% SBA

+0.11% Roth IRA

+0.57% S&P

+0.53% DJIA

+0.35% Nasdaq

Harry Made Me Sad...

... he has that power over my portfolio. All it takes is a -4.36% retracement from HWD to make or break my day. It might also be because I didn't go to Church yesterday. What?

But my main focus is the young, twenty-something (and probably handsome) Mr 9 Figures. I'm still waiting for him to call and give me the greatest trading plaisir of my life. But I am by no means desperate! Over the weekend, a few other 8 to 9 Figure Suitors responded with enthusiasm to my email marketing campaign. So far, my response rate is about 16%! That's one hot campaign. And this was only a four sentence email. Apparently, I said all the right things and I won't have to resort to the fax machine if all goes well.

Anything would be better than my report card and I might have to call my trading a day if this continues.

-1.11% SBA

-2.36% Roth IRA

-1.07% S&P

-1.14% DJIA

-1.06% Nasdaq

My Man Called...

... but we're delaying our trading plaisir till at least Monday of next week. He initially wouldn't budge on my fee, but then I told him that since he was my first consulting gig, he'll get something extra special from me, but he better move fast because some of his competitors already want what can only be given out once - totally true since my email marketing worked like my Tiffany charm bracelet.

Hopefully, what occurred today with my portfolio can only occur once too:

Thursday

-0.21% SBA

-0.01% Roth IRA

+0.01% S&P

+0.12% DJIA

-0.05% Nasdaq

Friday

-0.79% SBA

-1.30% Roth IRA

+0.38% S&P

+0.46% DJIA

+0.16% Nasdaq

Heiress Balance Sheet

JPM reported its earnings today and beat forecasts by about $0.12 according to my E*Trade trading platform. And to think... it all started with one man's vision to build a fortress balance sheet. I don't have Jamie Dimon's brains, but I'm pretty determined to be the best that I can be. And determination is what I have! If he can build a fortress balance sheet, then I reckon I'll be able to build an heiress balance sheet of my own.

The past few days have been especially busy, but I've been very efficient. I resorted to email marketing today and reached out to almost 30 of my nine figure man's competitors. As of now, I'm still dying to hear from Mr Few Hundred Million, but if I don't hear from him, then his competitors might be able to step in and fill my financial void, giving my balance sheet a boost. In a few days, I'm going to use fax and then leave it at that. Then, it'll be up to my nine figure man and his competitors to contact me. I may call the most important ones...

Whilst many people would stop at the cake that already exists, I'm always interested in baking another one from scratch so that one can theoretically have her cake and eat it too - or let them eat cake, which is apparently a historical inaccuracy, but that's besides the point.

Anyway, the companies I targeted are not already part of the existing market, but could be. I may be able to rewrite my industry's history and take my life from tragedy to strategy, from dope to hope, and from sin to win. This is going to get fun, just like my portfolio today:

+0.02% SBA

+0.60% Roth IRA (so close to beating the Nasdaq...)

+0.03% S&P

+0.06% DJIA

+0.61% Nasdaq

Don't forget: 15 April = BAC's turn...

The Waiting Game

I have been waiting and waiting and I don't think I've ever wanted a guy to call so much! Finally, I succumbed to the trading plaisir of doing another nine figure deal and I sent him an email. Now, I'm waiting again. This negotiation has been going on for almost a month.

I hope my email was the right move. He explicitly told me that if I don't hear from him for a few days, it means that there is no further upside on my consultation fee. I laughed, but I secretly like a man who can negotiate like that. I have new ammunition though and I have something of value and therefore will maintain my trading dignity even in face of a rapidly diminishing cash flow scenario.

After my visit to the spa, it has been a downhill tread as far as my portfolio goes. But I've been experiencing an enhanced feeling of tranquil well-being ever since.

Yesterday:

-2.97% SBA

-1.52% Roth IRA

-0.28% S&P

+0.01% DJIA

-0.32% Nasdaq

Today:

-0.02% SBA

-0.36% Roth IRA

-0.78% S&P

-0.95% DJIA

-0.96% Nasdaq

Tomorrow:

Gearing up for Earnings Season and hopefully will also have great news to report on my first consulting gig! Whoever previously ran my stops better be keeping me in their prayers.. when I sign this gig, you may get a chance to do it one more time! But do you think I'll let you?

Rub A Dub Dub, Let's Soak In My Tub

I spent the early part of my day relaxing at a nearby spa, making use of their sauna and steam bath as well as enjoying a 1.5 hour massage. Don't tell anyone, but when I was still in Belgium, I let it get to the point of a 3 hour massage every week. Shhh... I know it's very naughty of me.

Anyway, their receptionist told me about their 2 hour massage, but this time, I opted for the lower budget indulgence. Once I sign my nine figure deal, I'm going to make this a regular treat for myself because darn it, I deserve it!

Mmm... especially after today's performance, my dear Sultans!

+0.32% SBA

+0.73% Roth IRA

-0.40% S&P

-0.24% DJIA

-0.56% Nasdaq

And I'm totally underselling myself, aren't I? Nine figure deal and I only get six figures? Jamie Dimon there has totally got himself a lucrative, desirable gig. If only I had his brains...

I Can Feel It...

... a lot more Hermes is in my destiny! And like Hermes states on their web site: you're in the driving seat... Et moi? I'll just get in the Hermes ooh la la car...

Isn't that just plain adorable? So creative, so Hermes!

+1.57% SBA

+0.21% Roth IRA

-0.15% S&P

-0.14% DJIA

-0.13% Nasdaq

How weird is it that all the US stock indices are so tightly correlated today? Something must be in the air and tomorrow, I think we'll see what it is!

Remember Earnings Season will be here before long!

Coral Grief

Doctor, help! ForexDiva's in pain...

As the US budget impasse continues and as squeaks about Portugal's debt grow louder, my portfolio similarly retraced in a major way today. But research pays off.

Last night, I found myself wishing I had paid more attention to my intro to accounting professor years ago. Honestly, I only remember what his glasses looked like and something about depreciation and amortization. However, I think I may be onto formulating a very lucrative tax reduction strategy and I'm going to share some of my bimbo thoughts with my favourite Professors of Finance when I have more time.

For now, I'm handing in my frightening report card:

+1.09% SBA

-0.97% Roth IRA

+0.24% S&P

+0.27% DJIA

+0.31% Nasdaq

Is it me, or does my Roth IRA now seem to be severely negatively correlated with the general market? I secretly ponder whether that is a positive or a negative, but I suppose I'll be able to react with my SBA if my Roth IRA begins to underperform.

Yesterday Wasn't A Good Day...

... I hurt my foot, my web site was on again off again, and my portfolio went down. It was a test of faith.

Today, even though the US government was reported to be on the verge of shutdown according to FT.com, my personal story's very different. I'm just about to close a consulting offer where I'll be making more money than my previous salary with the prospect of many more to come over the next several months, my web site is on again, and my portfolio went up.

It's a beautiful world in ForexDiva Land and it is my goal to close this consulting offer and get my mojo back. I'm already dreaming about calling Hermes, HSFTs...

-1.42% SBA

+0.95% Roth IRA

-0.08% S&P

-0.05% DJIA

+0.07% Nasdaq

P.S. HWD +5.09%

The Diva's Got Back(bone)...

It was Non Farm Pay Day and my fourth month going into the whole diva's got backbone thing. It definitely hasn't been easy, although lately, I've been feeling a lot more: dignity, check. Self-respect, check. Chastity, check. Especially today with unemployment falling to 8.8% and job creation of +216,000. Harry tried again for $17, closing very close to it at $16.71. I noticed a 5,000 bid size on HWD earlier today and haven't seen those for a while. A typical bid size on HWD is a few hundred. We closed with an ask price poised above $17 though. So will Monday bring more trading plaisir from the Monsieur?

-3.18% SBA (it's not as bad as it appears, although any minus is a minus in Diva World)

+0.63% Roth IRA

+0.5% S&P

+0.46% DJIA

+0.31% Nasdaq

The Ministers of Finance, the GOLS, are now back above 6000 and Shanghai is moving towards 3000 again. Is this the moment I've been waiting for? We'll find out next week!

Happy Shiny Weekend... I'm going to cook up a six figure storm!